One week ago yesterday, I was notified that my position was being eliminated, along with a half dozen others. While jarring at first, I now find myself inspired and driven by this unforeseen change in my path.  I’m excited to see this journey unfold and where it will take me, my family, and the new connections that I make. I am looking for a position that will leverage my passion and talent for growing partnerships (pre and/or post sales), while simultaneously influencing the evolution of the business internally as we strive toward success. I am seeking roles that are similar to or related to these titles – senior director/VP of Customer Success, Strategic Alliances, and perhaps eventually moving in the direction toward something like a “Chief of Staff.”  Ultimately I love working with the humans…we are so much more complicated than software.

As an experiment, I crafted a weekend to be alone in silence for two days. What does “silence” mean? It meant no phone, no texting, no Internet, no journaling, no reading, nothing but eating, sleeping, meditating, and possibly yoga if I felt compelled. The rules were clear and I believed a platform for introspection and peace. Introspection, yes. Peace, no.

My mind is alway spinning with ideas and thoughts and discussions and debates and regrets and replays of past and fantasy of future and…spinning is the correct word. Never ending. Or as my lovely has donned it “a roller coaster.” Riding this coaster alone in “silence” isn’t much different than riding it alongside others. The benefit is to the others. So no peace found here.

However this experience did reveal the clear wisdom of mindfulness and focus on the breath. The breath is always there, like the racing thoughts, but the breath brings peace, nourishment, grace, and focus. Through the breath, I find now. Between the breaths I touch silence.

My breath reminds me, now, what it means to be alive. To feel. To enjoy the moments. To allow the spinning mind and appreciate the gift it brings me – desire to seek the silence. So similarly to the wisdom of Mozart on music¹, I now see that life is not experienced in action or thought, but in the silence between.